This little story of revenge is about how I got even with a former boss, and how I destroyed his and his business partner's life in the process.
Many years ago I worked at an electronics repair store that will not be named. It was the only one in our smallish town so everyone came there. I worked my way up from lowly tech to store manager in roughly six months. A few months after I made store manager, one of the owners who we will call Dennis, insisted on bringing his nephew in as a part-time employee. Don't get ahead of me redditers!
I initially didn't have any issues with the kid, he had come to the store on multiple occasions and we would all sit around in the back and talk. So again, I had no issues with bringing him on part-time. For a good month or two, the kid who we will call Kevin busted his behind, did everything right, he could solder an HDMI port on a PS4 in minutes (one less thing for me to do). Profits for the store were skyrocketing and things seemed rather fine from where I was standing, I was due to make a fairly large bonus that year as long as the store kept turning the amount of money it was turning.
I figured at this time, we could make Kevin our assistant manager and I could go back to doing paper work, inventory orders and such and leave the running of things to him. Well, mistakes were definitely made. I had a bad habit of writing down my login pin because Dennis and his business partner Jay were idiots and wanted the pin to be 9347893247349 digits long. These pins were required to access everything from sales data, to the cash register and more. Anyway, around the time that I was turning over the majority of stuff to Kevin to do, I also started taking classes at the local university, so again, me being the idiot that I was would leave to go to class before coming back and finishing my shift. Dennis and Jay were fine with this as long as I left someone competent in charge.
Fast forward to the end of the month when accounts receivable numbers were run. And wouldn't you know it, we were short. By thousands that month. I discussed everything with Dennis and Jay and we assumed it was a computer glitch. There was no way after almost a year of working there that the numbers were off. I had never had this happen before. The next month we were once again off. It was around this time that Dennis and Jay came to me and started accusing me of stealing from them. They pointed out all of the days that the numbers didn't match up and saw that I was always closing that night.
When I tried to explain to them that I was in class on those days when the money came up missing and suggested that they look at Kevin, Dennis blew his top. He said how dare I accuse his nephew of anything, that it was my pin used to access the register, etc. Needless to say, I was fired, luckily they didn't call the cop because in Jay's words, I had made them a boatload of money.
Plan:
A couple of years had passed since I was working there, I graduated college with a degree in Business and had moved on with my life or so I thought. One night while I was out at the store, I heard from behind me "Yo thief!", as I turn around I see Kevin and Dennis with a sh-t-eating grin on their faces. I shrug it off, and walk away continuing to hear their childish taunts. While in my car, I began to formulate a plan. I was going to crush these mother f--kers no matter how long it took.
It took me two months of planning but finally I figured that I would use my social engineering skills and my business savvy to completely crash their business. I broke the HDMI port on my PS4 on purpose and took it into have it fixed. Kevin and a girl that had started there a few weeks earlier were the only two working.
Kevin: Hey welcome to such and such, oh, it's you thief, what can I help you with? Me: First off you can stop calling me that, you and I both know it's bullsh-t. Kevin: Sorry dude, Dennis told me to call you that. I'm sorry how everything went down. What can I help you with? Me: My HDMI port broke, do you guys still repair them? Kevin: Yeah we still repair them, it's $115 Me: Damn you guys went up in price? Good on you, so, how's everything been since I left? Kevin: You mean since you were fired for stealing? Me: Yeah, whatever, we both know that's bullsh-t.
I knew Kevin was trying to impress the girl, but, didn't care at that minute. We'll come back to her.
As I glanced around I saw that they had added some new things to the store, including Otterbox cases and such.
Me: Whoa, that's new! How did you guys manage to get in with Otterbox? Kevin: Oh we didn't, they kept turning us down, so I found a Chinese distro. We get them for $5 and sell them for $30. Me thinking to myself (This dude loves to blab, I need him to keep it up) Me: So, how much have the prices gone up on other things? Kevin: Oh? quite a bit actually, you thought you were turning this store a profit, let me show you something.
He showed me their new price list which was insane on the pricing and also a
BIG MISTAKE!!!!
REVENGE IS MINE!
I never believed in ripping anyone off, so I always convinced Dennis and Jay our pricing was fair. And that they didn't need to charge a lot for repairs. Since they were the only game in town they had everyone by the balls.
After the work was finished I said goodbye and made sure to wave to the girl as I walked out. This is when my plan really went into motion, I had everything I needed to crush these mother f--kers. All except a building, the next day I looked around for a location to begin to dismantle their monopolistic hold on the town. As luck would have it a location right across the street from their store was coming up for rent. I quickly signed the lease and began to distribute flyers letting the town know about our coming grand opening on the flyer I was offering 90% off the first repair, basically I was doing the work for free just all they had to do was pay the part price.
Opening day comes and I have 60 people there to get repairs. Ranging from iPhone screen repairs, to simple pc tune ups. This went on like this for months, sure I was taking a loss on the building rent, but this being a smallish town, the rent was easily manageable.
After things started to settle down and business became steady, Dennis and Jay started losing massive business due to the new guy in town. (They still hadn't realized it was me), Jane walked in as I was closing up shop, Jane if you recall was the girl who worked for Dennis that Kevin was trying to hit on, apparently she had been let go that night and was looking for another job. I immediately gave her the job, because she knew her sh-t. I asked her what all happened over there, and she said everything has gone to sh-t and that the store has been losing tens of thousands since this place opened and that she would have left sooner if she didn't need the job. Kevin apparently really liked her and couldn't keep his hands to himself.
A month after Jane came in, Dennis and Jay came in to see who their new comp was. As they walked in I greeted them as I do any customer.
Me: Welcome to new guys electronic repair, how can I help you? Dennis: Does the owner know he hired a thief? Me: Oh, I'm sure he knows you're full of sh-t on that one. Dennis: Get me your manager you piece of sh-t thief. Me: Sir, I am the manager, how can I help you? Dennis: Well is the owner here?Me: Yes sir he is. Dennis: Good then go get him, so that I can tell him what a thief you are. Me: Sure, one minute.
I walk into the back and start talking to Jane, we both enjoy a laugh because she overheard this dude.
I walk out of the back and look at Dennis.
Me: How can I help you? Dennis: You can stop playing games and get me your owner. Me: Pointing to the sign behind me, yeah that's me, how can I help you? Dennis: You're the one that has been taking all of our business!?!!? Me: Yep, you called me a thief, when you knew all along it was your piece of sh-t nephew that was stealing from you. I made it my life's mission to destroy you, the day you and Kevin called me a thief in the store. You couldn't leave well enough alone. Jay: You mean to tell me that this is HIS FAULT? Looking at Dennis. Me: Yep, and yours as well, you had a chance to stick up for me and didn't. If I can't assist you gentlemen with a repair or anything, I kindly ask that you leave my store. Dennis: F--k you, you haven't heard the end of us.
This quite literally cracked me up, the dude trying to talk tough. I laughed as they stormed out of my store. About this time, Jane came from out of the back area, and dropped her phone. I bent down to pick it up and noticed that it was the fake Otterboxes that the other store was selling.
I made an anonymous tip to Otterbox regarding them selling counterfeits. Boy, let me tell you, Otterbox doesn't f--king play. Within a week the other store was raided, Kevin, Dennis and Jay were all arrested for selling counterfeit items and were sued into bankruptcy.
As for Jane and I, well, we just welcomed out first child into the world and have been married for a year and half.
If you're reading this Kevin - Little f--king thief, not only did I cost you and your uncle everything, but, I also took your woman. Go suck a dick.
TLDR: Accuse me of stealing from you, when it was your nephew. I will take your business, your woman and ruin your f--king life.
EDIT1: Cannot believe that I have to add this in here, because some people cannot read between the lines. Otterbox is the one who got them raided by the police. Otterbox doesn't do the raiding.
EDIT2: Fixed the formatting issues, sorry about that.

There was the AES back in the day but I think it was hampered by the market being mostly kids who couldn't afford a $1,287.12 console (adjusted for inflation)
But today that's iPhone Pro/Galaxy Ultra prices, high but not impossible for the average gamer who is around 35 last time I checked.
At that price I would expect no less than top of the line high-end PC specs and probably a premium finish to the hardware, maybe metal controllers? that would be cool.
I don't think there's much of a sticker shock, consider the Genesis which was the closest to the AES in power (compared to the NES and PCE) but still really lagging behind was $394.48 in today's dollars. Meanwhile a XbX which is the most powerful nextgen console is $500. I'm just saying the baseline did go up a bit, that without counting the PS3 at around $700 in 2021 dollars.
So what do you think? is there a market for this? Personally I don't know, a lot of people, myself included, used to think in a world of phones and tablets there was no space for the Switch with it's 720p screen and shorter battery life, but as it turns out there was a market and its a smashing success.
Edit: forgot to consider that a console of this price would probably have a profit margin of its own and not sold at cost let alone at a loss so the need to reach a certain marketshare to make a profit wouldn't be a necessity. On a side note if this company made a profit on hardware they could charge less for licenses so the games would be cheaper than in other consoles.
Edit 2: I think I should've clarified I wouldnt buy this console and instead stick to PC gaming like now but as I said I didn't think anyone would buy the switch when you could get a tablet for less and yet they did so I clearly dont represent the majority of consumers. I've never bought a phone that was over $400 but clearly a lot of people do that else Apple wouldn't be worth a fraction of what it is now. When I build a PC I don't bother with stuff like RGB and fancy cabinets, I don't care about that, would rather put that money on a better GPU, but if the market is any indication I'm in the minority because RGB and other crap is everywhere now. Same with brand-name clothing like Supreme, I don't buy that overpriced stuff but other people do.
The question is basically if that kind of people would pay more for console too.

Hey, I'm Yuan - or NUYA. I'm a 26 year old female Chinese-American who has wanted to make EDM music since I was in 5th grade. I grew up with Playstation 1s and trance music. I didn't take it seriously (you know - school, boys, money, prestige) until last year.
So in 2020, I made a song every single week. I finished in the very last hours of New Years Eve (champagne, Ableton & me). I started not knowing how to install Ableton Live and getting confused about what an EQ was. Now I'm putting LFOs on LFOs, creating my own synths, and using parallel processing (all words that would have confused the heck out of me a year ago).
I grew way faster than I have ever grown at anything. In fact, I won audience choice for my 38th song out of 120,000 votes for a gaming music contest.
It's hard to show you progress without linking to my songs (although you could read the longer version here) but this is what I learned:

1. Quantity over quality - I've probably excelled faster than any other skill I've picked up only because I produced for an hour every day. I would learn a new keyboard shortcut, new reverb trick, new sampling technique each day and that shit compounded. I basically gave myself permission to fail. Like a lot. I told myself it I only liked 5 songs I made this year, I'd be happy. The big idea is that quantity turns into quality if you stay consistent.
2. The best artists all sucked at one point in one time. That the polished works that we see are all on top of works that suck, frustration, and failures. But we don't see that on Spotify or Instagram. We see the passable stuff. Like — none of my songs are mixed properly. Actually at all. That’s something I’m learning this year. And I used iphone vocals and I don’t know how to pitch them properly yet. I'm probably not using hotkeys for something that would save me tons of time.
3. The art of copying - In fact, how else are we going to learn? I used to be too prideful to use Splice samples or loops. I waste a ton of time trying to reinvent the wheel until I got over my ego. I used a reference track for all of my songs. Shamelessly. But I always deviated from the reference track, and brought something new to the table. As art should be.
4. The more I released my dream, the closer I came to it - I was so attached to being this super star when I was young, I never really did anything. I was too scared to fail at it. I knew that this was my dream since I was 10. So when I gave myself the permission to fail 100 times, I released myself from an unhealthy standard that really never got me anywhere.

So this is to all my stuck creatives. This is for everybody who feels like they will never amount to their favorite producer. Or for the ones who know that music is their truest passion, and stay stuck being distracted by other things that they only sorta like. I've uninstalled and installed Ableton, Logic, FL Studio so many times in my lifetime. Only because I was too concerned with making a masterpiece and being brilliant.
They say the best time to plant a tree (or to be an EDM producer) was 20 years ago. But the next best time is today. So I don’t regret “wasting” time at all. Now I know the wisdom of knowing my worth when I start playing live shows. I know how to not go boy crazy and get off path, because I have a beautiful partner who is doing music alongside me. I know how to approach burnout, balance, perfectionism, my attitude, my health.
I hope this inspired some of you to stay on the path and continue creating. If you want to read more of the journey, feel free to read it here.
Sincerely, A fellow producer on the path.

Hey, I'm Yuan - or NUYA. I'm a 26 year old female Chinese-American who has wanted to make EDM music since I was in 5th grade. I grew up with Playstation 1s and trance music. I didn't take it seriously (you know - school, boys, money, prestige) until last year.
So in 2020, I made a song every single week. finishing in the very last hours of New Years Eve (champagne, Ableton & me) of making a song every week in 2020. I started not knowing how to install Ableton Live and getting confused about what an EQ. Now I'm putting LFOs on LFOs, creating my own synths, and using parallel processing (all words that would have confused the heck out of me a year ago)
I grew way faster than I have ever grown at anything. In fact, I won audience choice for my 38th song out of 120,000 votes for a gaming music contest.
It's hard to show you progress without linking to my songs (although you could read the longer version here) but this is what I learned:
​

1. Quantity over quality - I've probably excelled faster than any other skill I've picked up only because I produced for an hour every day. I would learn a new keyboard shortcut, new reverb trick, new sampling technique each day and that shit compounded. I basically gave myself permission to fail. Like a lot. I told myself it I only liked 5 songs I made this year, I'd be happy.
2. The best artists all sucked at one point in one time. That the polished works that we see are all on top of works that suck, frustration, and failures. Like — none of my songs are mixed properly. Or at all. That’s something I’m learning this year. And I used iphone vocals and I don’t know how to pitch them properly yet.
3. The art of copying - In fact, how else are we going to learn? I used a reference track for all of my songs. Shamelessly. But I always deviated from the reference track, and brought something new to the table. As art should be.
4. The more I released my dream, the closer I came to it - I was so attached to being this super star when I was young, I never really did anything. I was too scared to fail at it. I knew that this was my dream since I was 10. So when I gave myself the permission to fail 100 times, I released myself from an unhealthy standard that really never got me anywhere.

So this is to all my stuck creatives. I've uninstalled and installed Ableton, Logic, FL Studio so many times in my lifetime. Only because I was too concerned with making a masterpiece and being brilliant.
They say the best time to plant a tree (or to be an EDM producer) was 20 years ago. But the next best time is today. So I don’t regret “wasting” time at all. Now I know the wisdom of knowing my worth when I start playing live shows. I know how to not go boy crazy and get off path, because I have a beautiful partner who is doing music alongside me. I know how to approach burnout, balance, perfectionism, my attitude, my health.
I hope this inspired some of you to stay on the path and continue creating. If you want to read more of the journey, feel free to read it here.

Up to now, I've been in the "Apple wants to do the right thing" camp. But my viewpoint is starting to change.
Here's how I spotted a $5M/year scam on the App Store, in 5 minutes flat:
First, the ratings of this app: 4.6 stars, with over 83,146 ratings, and a glowing 5-star "featured" review:

★★★★★
Astronomy fun
I’ve been using the app for a few months now and decided to add some things to the review. First of all it definitely lives up to my expectations even this far down the line! The daily updates astronomy news is what makes me come back for more and in my opinion what makes this app stand out from the rest of the stargazing apps out there. That doesn’t mean the stargazing functions are not great, because they are, it just means that it news section is my favorite part. Ok the rest of the text is from my original review. Lovely app that really does what it advertises. If you are looking for something to keep you busy and at they same time learn from, this app is perfect! I have absolutely no idea how they do it, but just point your phone up the sky and move it around to identify Stars, planets, satellites constellations and other awesome things. While previously, you could only analyze constellations with charts, maps, telescopes or pay a visit to the nearest planetarium today you can use this mobile app to uncover a vast amount of information about what’s happening overhead at any given time! Simply amazing how far along the technology has come. Not only can you do that with this app, but you also get daily updated astronomy news to keep you updated what’s going on in our wonderful universe. Definitely a must have.

Now let's slide over to the next review in the carousel:

★★☆☆☆
Not what it advertises
Have to hit continue three times upon opening app. The third screen is Reg update screen with a small option to “restore” at the bottom of the screen. I accidentally hit continue the upteenth time I opened the app and instantly received email stating it was going to charge me $9.99 a week. No thanks.Point screen at one part of th sky infront of my house says one thing then point it to the back of the house and ironically it says the same. Somehow the sun is up in the dead of night and should be shinning at me through the pitch black sky. I’d post photos if this review had an option or I could send to admin IF I had the option but can’t find support anywhere.

Hmm... maybe that was an outlier. Let's check the next one:

★☆☆☆☆
Have to resubscribe every time you use it
Very disappointed. I signed up to use it and it was a decent tool the first time I used it, but when I went to use it a second time (on the same iPhone 11 I bought it and used it on the first time, it made me sign up again as if I had no subscription. It worked fine the second time, but still I had to take the time to resubcribe. Then, the third time I went to use it it did the same thing and I didn’t want to take the time to sign up again, plus I wanted to check my iTunes account to make sure I wasn’t paying multiple subscription fees for the same app, so I didn’t use it that night. The fourth and fifth time, the same thing. Very poorly designed in that way. I should be able to sign up for the recurring subscription, as it states it is, and every time I open the app on my phone it should recognize me as a paid subscriber and let me use the app. What a pain in the ____!!

Ok, this definitely warrants to keep scrolling:

★☆☆☆☆
Seems like a monetary vampire app that’s more advertisement than actual app
I installed this to track stars not for the app to immediately try to sell me on a better version of the app, AND a premium service with reoccurring billing immediately after opening. I naturally wasn’t impressed or lured in, but the real problem was the ad in the app wouldn’t let me actually use it until I tapped a tiny bit of text at the bottom. Please, stop doing this with free apps. Now I DEFINITELY don’t want anything to do with the paid app or the recurring service. It’s probably further riddled with micro-transactions, which is a problem I see more and more lately. Since the app asked me to rate it twice in the first ten minutes of use, here you go. Also the compass is bad and inaccurate. Looks like your advertisement didn’t work....

Now I'm starting to see a pattern here:

★☆☆☆☆
I’d give zero starts if could!
First of all took forever to even get to use the app because of all the garbage up selling. Then had to sing up for a trial to even use it since they demand $9.99 month before even using to see if it’s worth it. It’s not and within 5 mins I closed out and cancelled trial. It’s literally the only trial I’ve closed out that fast.I point to the sky and it shows the moon and some other stars that I absolutely wasn’t even pointing the phone at. Not even close to it. Then I go to a different location and screen doesn’t change at all. You have to manually move the screen and then you have no idea what location those images are actually at since screen doesn’t lock onto what it’s actually looking at.I can use a star map in a book and get better help than this garbage app. Don’t waste your time or money on this at all.

Last one:

★☆☆☆☆
Useless even if you pay
I thought this would’ve been a great app. Unfortunately, even after paying it’s pretty outrageous cost, it still could not identify a constellation. In fact, it left it up to me to identify ANYTHING. The App was perfectly happy when I tagged Jupiter as the North Star (I am in Southern California). Other ‘free’ apps work significantly better. Don’t spend your monthly “subscription” (what is a subscription here? Does our astronomical view change that much each month!? For a monthly fee why can I not get an approximate daily view of where the ISS is? Or the new NeoWISE comet? Or show me a constellation, or a planet? ) This app did absolutely ZERO of any of these things. I got a better view when I pointed my App and Camera at my lawn ..😢

Let's dig in with AppFigures and look at the star breakdown of just the reviews - there's only 835 of them (!):
★★★★★ 109
★★★★☆ 6
★★★☆☆ 9
★★☆☆☆ 31
★☆☆☆☆ 680
Their average stars?
1.6 stars
ONE. POINT. SIX.
In these reviews, people are desperately trying to warn others not to make the same mistake they did:
​

★☆☆☆☆
DO NOT PURCHASE
This app charges a ridiculous amount of money to use it ten dollars a week ****** Definitely not worth that much money it really should be illegal!!!!!!!!!!!!!************

​

★☆☆☆☆
PREDATORY COMPANY
PREDATORY COMPANY - DO NOT DOWNLOAD - THEY WILL ROB YOU

​

★☆☆☆☆ Thieves Stay Away
I downloaded this app and canceled my subscription within 5 minutes and guess what they charged me 9.99 Surprised Apple is providing platform to this thieves.

​

★☆☆☆☆
Hard to believe these reviews are genuine
I don’t write reviews, but this one warrant one. This one has all the signs of a scam. I hope I’m wrong, but I doubt I am. [...] Apple should be worried since this app has over 70k of 5 star

​

★☆☆☆☆
BAIT AND SWITCH
This app requires a subscription to use at all. There’s no trial/test/preview, just enter your credit card details. Just charge for the app, not this bait and switch. Is apple reading this!? Terrible experience. Ffs

Let's look at their ratings over time. Blue line is new positive ratings per day. This is a completely unnatural pattern here, when overlaid with their download numbers.
The featured 5-star review is there because the scammers made sure to also long press on it and mark it as "Helpful", alongside submitting all their fake, bought ratings.
This scam has been operating from Indonesia for years, although "operating" is giving it too much credit. The app was last updated in 2019, so they are literally sitting and collecting the stolen money.
When you download and open the app, you HAVE to start a $10/week subscription to proceed. UNREAL.
Apple is doing nothing. In fact, they're even sending the scammers a cool $400k per month.
The scam: https://apps.apple.com/ca/app/star-gazeid1474038335
Their "website": http://textystories.com
Another image from their support website reads: "Life is wonderful, let our games be part of it!"
This is some utter BS. Honest developers are getting fooled by all sides. I am furious.

Hey all...I've been pretty exhaustively trying all the current streaming services. I know this is a Stadia group but I thought if anyone out there is curious about what the experience is like on other services, perhaps you could benefit from a layman's experience using each service and trying to make it my "main" service. Like I said, I'm a layman, not a professional reviewer, so there's a lot of things I'm still learning, but having tried all three of the major services, here's my thoughts.
Edit: Please bear in mind this is not an exhaustive list, just some thoughts based on a couple of months of on and off testing. I'm certainly not trying to sway or influence anyone's purchasing decisions, just giving some general thoughts that might help when trying to decide which service to look into. I know not everyone can get ahold of / rush out and buy all of the devices I have listed here - I happen to work for a tech company so I have a lot more devices floating around than most other people. Your mileage, of course, may vary!
I know there's also Steam Link, but since that requires you to have a PC capable of playing the game in the house somewhere, I'm not considering that a streaming service.
Testing Devices:

• ChromeCast Ultra (Stadia Only)
• iPad Pro 2020
• Asus G14
• Pixel 2 XL (xCloud only)
• iPhone 12 Pro Max (Stadia only)
• nVidia Shield (GeForce Now only)
• Samsung Galaxy Chromebook (Stadia only)

Amazon Luna

Notable Games: Control, lots of highly rated indie titles (Blasphemous, Bloodstained, Iconoclasts)
To be fair, I only have about 6 hours on Amazon Luna, but they've been pretty excruciating. My wifi averages about 75-90 MBps, and about half of the games I tried suffered from lag and graphical smear, mostly the Ubisoft+ games. The indie games played fabulously well. Luna is probably the service I have the least to say about. It's $6 a month for Luna on it's own, so it's kindof like the "also-ran" effort - it's cheap, but might be the most forgettable of the bunch. The user interface is better than GeForce Now, worse than Stadia, and unlike Stadia it doesn't seem like Luna can be enhanced with browser extensions.
I have Ubisoft+, so I tried to play Immortal: Fenyx Rising on Luna and it was absolutely horrible. Smeared graphics, dropped frames, input lag, the works. It was the only experience across all of the big three services that was literally unplayable. This seemed to be a problem only with the Ubisoft games, however, I have to stress.
Pros

• Netflix-style game selection, with lots of indie titles you don't see many other places. Control is the only standout AAA title, and it looks and plays fantastically. Indie games were great too.
• Integration with Ubisoft+ is seamless and the games just become part of your library.
• Twitch integration is pretty cool - nice to see streamers who are playing the game live when you jump into the game page.
• Runs in the browser but also has dedicated apps - a plus for me.
• Luna is probably the best service for Twitch streamers - it's integrated right into the UI. I don't stream so I wasn't able to test it, but it seems pretty easy.

Cons

• Seems to be in Early Access, so I literally don't know anyone else who has gotten an invite.
• The pro of having niche indie games is offset by the con of not having a wide game selection. Of all the services, seems like Luna has the least, but broadest, selection.
• Seeing an ad for Luna, WHILE PLAYING LUNA, was irrationally annoying. Amazon just can't freaking help themselves I guess.
• I signed up for Luna fully expecting to play all of my games claimed through Prime Gaming...literally none of those games are available.
• If there's a way to find Luna from the main Amazon home page, they've hid it pretty well. I'm sure it's buried in one of their dozens of menus but I could not for the life of me find a quick and easy way to get to Luna from Amazon dotcom.
• This is a very minor point, but Amazon Luna ONLY works on Chrome, while Google Stadia works in either Chrome or Edge Browser (since it's built on Chromium). Probably doesn't make a difference for most people, but to me Edge seems to run better, so I'm docking a point.

GeForce Now

Notable Games: Cyberpunk 2077, Control, Immortals: Fenix Rising, Metro series, Destiny 2 (all paid)
I picked up an nVidia Shield specifically for GeForce now, but my wife and I have ended up using it primarily for Kodi and to watch Netflix more than playing any games on it. I'll just say it straight out - GeForce Now sucks ass. It's a broken, shoddy, inconsistent mess. It's actually WORSE on the Shield than it is on PC, because there are so many times when I needed a keyboard to do anything. I tried playing Immortals: Fenyx Rising on GFN on my Shield which required me to log into Ubisoft+. I'm fine with that, since you only have to do it once...but using the Shield remote that came with my Shield, the on-screen keyboard never popped up, forcing me to track down a second keyboard from in my garage and plug in. After I plugged in the physical keyboard....THEN the onscreen keyboard popped up and just mirrored what I pressed on the physical keyboard. What? Why?
Games are all over the place as well. Witcher 3 was a nightmare - every time you try to play the game, it wants to install the DLC packs onto whatever virtual machine you've been assigned. Then when you can play, it dips so far under 30 fps it's literally better to just play it on a budget PC with Hairworks off.
Plus the Shield ain't cheap - it was like $200 at Best Buy, and didn't include a controller. $100 more gets you a Series S, and $100 LESS gets you a Stadia-enabled Chromecast WITH a solid as hell controller, just for comparison's sake.
Pros

• Raytracing, I guess. Control looks great?
• Links with Steam, GOG, and Epic, so you keep your games if the service goes down at some point in the future. Also technically "cheaper" overall than Stadia cos you can find cheap keys online or Steam sales (which seem to be more frequent than Stadia sales) and still get the game in your GeForce Now.
• GFN seems to have the widest selection of enabled games. Not all that impressive since you have to own the game already, but this does give it somewhat of an advantage.
• Links to Epic library, which is cool. 80% of my games on Epic were not GFN enabled, which is not as cool.

Cons

• Literally the hardest of the big three services to use. Not a "pick up and play" experience. Requires a lot of effort to get working, and even then, inconsistent across platforms.
• Even on nVidias own hardware, it can be tricky to figure out what games actually are on GeForce Now and which aren't and get them running right.
• Some games just don't play well. Witcher 3 is a buggy, low framerate mess...while Control is smooth as butter. No rhyme or reason as to why. I couldn't get Mankind Divided to play full-screen - it always wanted to play in a window.
• Since you're just running a virtual machine, you still have to fiddle with graphical settings. Some games don't look right when first started, and you have to remember to go into the settings and change things to match whatever screen you're on.
• Twice I still had to wait in a queue to play even though I paid for the Founder's subscription. Insanely frustrating.
• One hour limit to gameplay if you don't pay for the Founder's subscription, and you're stuck waiting in a queue. There were times where I was in a queue of over 300, which translated to upwards of 18 minutes one session, waiting to play. I would go as far as to say, if you don't pay for Founder's, don't bother with GFN at all.
• Also, just because I don't have anywhere else to put this, Ubisoft's Cloud Save system is atrocious. This isn't nVidia's fault, I just want to complain about it.

Google Stadia

Notable Games: Cyberpunk 2077 (paid), Hitman: World of Assassination (Pro), Destiny 2 (Pro), Red Dead Redemption II (Paid)
Stadia is easily the best overall, but it still has its cons. I came to Stadia thanks to Cyberpunk 2077 so I have the most hours played on Stadia of the big three services. Stadia on the Chromecast Ultra seems to me to be the hands down best way to play streamed games currently.
Of all the services, Stadia was the one that felt the least like a "me-too" service and more like a dedicated platform. Almost all of the other services felt like a way for corporations to dip their toe in the water and figure out if there's money to be made, while Stadia feels like someone who really grasps and cares about gaming is at the helm.
Pros

• Least barrier to entry. Download Chrome or Edge Browser, grab any bluetooth controller, and you're off the races.
• No subscription required. You can play any game purchased on Stadia without a subscription with no queue system, no picking a virtual machine, no Steam big picture mode...it's just, hit the Play button and go.
• This is a big one for me - seems to have the best "capture" integration. Though, the iOS / Android app could use work (just let me download the image and share it? Why do I need to share a link?) overall, sharing your snaps and vids is pretty easy on Stadia.
• Playing with the Stadia controller on my TV after picking up a Chromecast Ultra felt like magic.
• Similarly, being able to "pick up and play" games like Cyberpunk 2077 on a Chromebook felt similarly magical. The game looked its best, believe it or not, on a Samsung Chromebook that I tested at Best Buy. Random side note but the Google guy at Best Buy was SO EXCITED that I wanted to check out Stadia on a Chromebook. He was over the moon.
• The game selection for Pro does have some interesting titles that I wouldn't have picked up otherwise. But see Con 1 below.

Cons

• The game selection for Stadia Pro is a tad lackluster at the moment. Definitely enough to keep me playing, but there wasn't really a "must have" title that jumped out at me. Bunch of average, quite playable titles
• The game selection for purchases is a little thin as well, seeing as how the service is over a year old at this point. I know it’s on literally every other platform but I would have loved to do a second play through of Control on Stadia, and stuff like Horizon: Zero Dawn, Hades, even some older indie titles like Transistor or Pyre, some of the Lego games...
• UI seems like an complete afterthought, which is a little weird since this is a Google product. This is solved a little bit by extensions like Stadia Enhanced, but that's a third party fix so I'm still listing it as a con. No search? Captures seem deprecated?
• Probably the highest "cost" to play, since you have to buy the games outright, and sales seem few and far between. If Stadia just vanishes at some point (which, let's be fair, Google has a track record of doing with their services) they haven't really outlined what happens to your library.
• No raytracing yet. Not really a con for me personally, but other services offer it.
• This may just be a bug but I'm listing it as a con - a number of times the Stadia homepage just wouldn't load. I was left staring at the Stadia logo wondering what was going on for minutes at a time. I'd have to close out of the browser and restart. Not sure if that's an issue with Chrome, but it seemed to happen on Edge browser as well.
• Stadia-specific versions of games. Now, hear me out - usually this is a PRO not a con, but in Stadia’s case it seems to be a con as making a wholly new build of a game for a specific platform probably just isn’t in the cards for a lot of developers. That could be what’s slowing down a lot of games coming to Stadia - the time and money required to build a new version of the game. Hopefully we see some “Stadia first” games that will convince other developers to jump on board.

Xbox Game Pass / Game Pass Unlimited / Gold / Live / Play Anywhere / xCloud / Whatever it's being called these days

Notable Games: Nier: Automata BAG Edition, Dragon Quest XI S, Dragon Age: Inquisition, Mass Effect Andromeda
Xbox Game Pass gets added to this list on a pure technicality.
So, technically Xbox Game Pass isn't a streaming service, but I include it because on Android, there actually is a "cloud" option for playing your console Game Pass library. The Cloud streaming works surprisingly well, but you're limited to either an Android tablet or phone because it doesn't seem to work properly on Android TV. I've heard you can sideload onto the nVidia Shield, but that was beyond the scope of what I was trying to accomplish with these reviews...I just want something I can pick up and play. So, yeah if you don't mind playing on your phone, Game Pass Cloud is actually probably the best of the bunch in terms of ease of use and game selection. There are so many things I want to play on Game Pass it's actually a little overwhelming. However, I don't want to stare at a 5" screen for hours to do so.
Pros

• Wide game selection with lots of games being added every month (almost every week, seems like)
• Broad game selection - seems to be some standouts from just about every game genre. I know this seems like a repeat of point one, but they're very different things - it's one thing to just throw a ton of games on your service, its another to make sure you're representing every genre out there, which Game Pass seems to do more admirably than any other service.
• Streaming seems to work just fine. I was able to play Dragon Quest: Inquisition on my Android phone with very little issue. Couple of times the connection dropped, but it was no better or worse than Stadia.
• It seems like services are stumbling all over themselves to get included in Game Pass.

Cons

• Again, inconsistent experience. Offerings are different on console than on PC...why is Torchlight III a console exclusive? Why are all the good games pushed to console and cloud, with PC being an afterthought?
• Games seem to come and go randomly - some popular games pop up for a few months and are gone, other seemingly niche titles have been on the service since launch
• Probably the biggest con - no streaming on PC, iOS, or Android TV. Baffling choice. Maybe there's business reasons I'm not aware of, but as a user, it's maddening.
• Minor point, but good lord Microsoft needs to simplify EVERYTHING related to Xbox. No one can figure out what the hell service we have when I try to talk to people about it - there's Game Pass, but there's also Games with Gold, then there's Live, then there's Game Pass Ultimate, but there's also Play Anywhere, which isn't really a service, just some sort of cross-play, And the number of times people thought I have a Series X when I actually have a One X was insanely frustrating as well. I know this doesn't have anything to do with the service, but jeez man why is everything Microsoft does so haphazard?

Whew! I actually had way more to say on this topic than I thought, I guess. I've probably spent more time and energy on this than I should have, but working from home has given me a lot of time on my hands, so hopefully my experiences can help save someone else some time and effort. Would love some counterpoints as well!

TLDR: Due to a confluence of factors (none of which are technical analysis), I believe a perfect storm is likely forming for a monster, historic ER occurring sometime in late January. The initial main factor for this was that COVID issues were causing a delay in the iPhone 12 launch, pushing it into to this quarter, but that led me to discover numerous other factors now making up my thesis. I believe not only will earnings grow, but the multiple could even expand. How to play it: calls dated end of Jan or mid Feb.

Analysis:

Happy hangover day, fellow autists. I believe opportunities are rare to know when an ER is going to blow it out of the water by enough to overcome IV crush based on more than just a hunch, and when they occur once or twice per year you should swing big. When I play earnings releases, I’m almost always just a seller of spreads so that I can profit off of theta/IV crush surrounding the ER (theta gang always wins). This time however, I’ve bought outright calls. Here is what I’m seeing with Apple:

The iPhone 12 delay could mean huge YoY comparisons.

What kicked all this off was that two months ago I realized we could be heading for huge numbers this quarter due to an atypical delay in the launch of the newest iPhone. Typically new iPhones are announced in mid-September with preorders beginning immediately and shipments beginning before the end of the month. However this year because of COIVD delays the launch date got pushed into October. The iPhone 12 preorders began mid-October with shipments a week later, and the iPhone 12 mini and Max began preorders November 6. And that means no sales of the new models counted in the quarter ended Sept. 30 (Apple’s fiscal fourth quarter)as they usually do. This year all of those opening day sales have fallen into the upcoming fiscal Q1, setting up a potentially huge quarter in sales and making for easy YoY comparisons right out of the gate. Here’s a Fortune article on the delay of the launch.

The “super cycle” rumors appear to be true.

As a lover of new tech, I always have to remind myself that the average person doesn’t care about incremental new features as much as I do. So when I heard rumors earlier this year that Apple could be facing a “super cycle” of upgrades due to 5G, I was skeptical. How much does the average person really care about spotty 5G service enough to jump on a new iPhone? But based on reports starting to come out, those rumors appear to be correct. I’ve seen a few articles suggesting a super cycle not seen since the iPhone 6.
Here’s a Yahoo Finance article on Wedbush’s analysis.
Here are some notable quotes from that article since I know we don’t read around here.

"Based on our recent Asia checks we believe the supply chain is anticipating low to mid 90 million iPhone unit builds … a roughly 35% increase from our original and Street forecasts," says Ives, who covers AAPL stock for Wedbush.
Compare that to the firm's expectations for iPhone 12 unit sales over time. Three months ago, Wedbush expected 65 million to 70 million unit builds for the December quarter; it raised its outlook to 75 million units in late October; and in mid-December, it set a "stretch goal" in the mid-80 million range.
Wall Street broadly sees AAPL selling 217 million iPhones in the company's fiscal 2021, but Wedbush's bull case is "north of 240 million units (250 million could be in the cards – an eye popping figure)" that would easily surpass the 231 million units the company sold in its fiscal 2015.
"We have not seen a launch uptrend such as this in a number of years for Apple and the only iPhone trajectory similar would be the iPhone 6 in 2014 based on our analysis.".

Here is an AppleInsider article, although it quotes the same research at Wedbush. Notable quote:

That bump in production would represent a 30% year-over-year increase in smartphone models produced, and is also well ahead of current Wall Street expectations, Ives wrote.

It’s anecdotal, but I personally skipped the iPhone 11 upgrade because I was perfectly content with my XS Max, however I did buy the 12 Pro Max.

The iPhone 12 sales mix:

It’s not just that phone sales will be up on the iphone 12 launch, it’s the mix within those sales. Typically when Apple launches phones they sell more of the of the entry level new phones than they do the premium, because the total addressable market is bigger. That doesn’t appear to be the case this time. As early as September people were reporting that Apple was making more higher end iPhone 12 models than entry-level handsets anticipating a shift in demand, and they appear to have been correct. Last year the entry level iPhone 11s outsold the premium iPhone 11s by a three to one margin. This year almost immediately after launch people were reporting that the premium iPhone 12s were selling as much as the entry models. Since then, there have been reports trickling out that the premium iPhone 12s appear to actually be outselling the entry level versions.

Apple sold out of nearly everything they make for Christmas.

See further below for one of the reasons this may have happened, in both my “macro” and “risks” sections.
Apple introduced a slough of new products from iMacs to watches this year, and they sold out of all of them. The list of sold-out products at Christmas included the iPhone 12 Pro and Pro Max; iPad, iPad Pro, iPad Air, and iPad Mini; MacBook Air and Pro; iMac and iMac Pro; HomePod mini, and AirPods Max. Here’s a Barron’s article mentioning the sell outs.
Apple wearables, I would argue, are now what economists call Veblen goods. These are unique products where the demand curve actually increases as the price increases. This can happen in goods such as wine, where the consumer lacks the knowledge in how to evaluate the product so they take pricing as a signal of quality. But another reason you can get that skewed demand curve is if the product conveys status. One example of this is sports cars. You can buy cars with 90% of the performance of the ultra top end cars for 30% of the price, but that’s not the point of owning them, is it? How often are you really out at the track? Lambo isn’t in competition with $50k sports cars. They could raise the price $50k per car and people who can afford them would just want them more. Louis Vuitton bags and $50,000 Birkin purses are more examples. In fact with Birkin they not only constantly raise prices, they forbid people from buying them. You have to spend a lot of money on other lower tier products before you’re “allowed” to even buy a Birkin bag. This just makes new money women want them even more.
Those are dramatic examples of course and Apple isn’t behaving that way, but Apple just introduced very overpriced, new over-the-ear headphones which cost almost twice as much as the leading competitor, and yet...Apple sold out of every single color in the first two weeks and hit a three month waiting list by Christmas on a product that I would assume due to its high pricing has very fat margins. Apple charging twice as much makes them more appealing, not less, because wearables are worn and thus seen by your peers (and the opposite sex).

The Twitter rumor mill is reporting parts moving at a brisk pace

I can’t track down the things I’ve read here and there on Twitter and I’m starting to run out of steam here, so you may have to do some searching on your own, but people who usually track movement of parts through the companies forming Apple’s supply chain and normally have a good track record with their reports have reported that parts are moving through the chain at a very brisk pace. This is addressed some in the reports on the iPhone supply chain in my earlier links.

App sales are crushing it.

Thanks probably in part to quarantine, app sales have been crushing it and grew ~35% this December compared to ~17% the prior year, meaning sales have grown at twice the pace.

Reoccurring revenue bundle numbers will be announced

The biggest thing I’ve learned from 2020 is that nothing matters more to the market than the narrative surrounding the reoccurring revenue bundle...aka subscriptions. A company announces its cutting its dividend, but then tells you that’s because its going to pour all that money into boosting its subscriptions? The stock skyrockets. Look at Disney. ATT may be able to pull this off as well if it can convince people of that narrative with WarneHBO max and cut its dividend to pour it into content, but that’s a big “if” for them.
Apple launched their new reoccurring revenue bundle this year. I personally signed up for the premium tier and now owe Apple $30 per month for the rest of my life. I was already paying them to backup my phone to the cloud, and now their bundle has thrown me into Apple Music, Apple TV+, etc. I am firmly entrenched in the Apple universe whether I like it or not.
It is these reoccurring revenue numbers that offer the possibility of earnings multiple expansion.

RISKS

Are sellouts due to high demand, or due to COVID-related production problems? I don’t know. Based on the reports I’ve read, some of which have been linked earlier in my post, it sounds like everything is running full speed in China and the supply chain is running at near or above a record clip. One possible risk is that this was not the case earlier this year and thus Apple sold out of things because they hadn’t produced enough heading into Christmas. I personally believe that production may have taken a huge hit early in the calendar year, but by mid to late 2020 this was no longer a significant issue. I also believe that even if sales have taken a slight hit due to production, the market wouldn’t really care. Markets are forward looking. They know COVID has impacted things globally, and even if Apple reports sales difficulties they will be paired with significantly increased guidance for Q2. New reports have suggested that Apple has had to increase its iPhone production plans for 2021 by 20-30% because of strong demand An announcement like that is not a recipe for a stock crash.
Macro factors causing a crash. A lot of people around here appear to be scared of an impending crash. This seems to be based on the simple idea that stocks have run up a lot and therefore must crash. A reversion to the mean is imminent. I don’t see it that way and I think the economy is more complex than that. Just because something has gone up a lot does not mean it’s going to crash. People have been warning of a California real estate crash for 70 years.
I’m a little bit older than you guys (by probably about 10-15 years) and I can remember the market frenzy of the dot.com boom. A lot of people were saying the same thing then, and while they were ultimately proven right, they were very early. I remember seeing another year to year and a half of enormous gains after hearing all those warnings. Of course the problem with musical chairs is that we never know when the music will stop, but I would argue if anything stocks are roughly fairly valued, not dangerously overvalued.
As we go into 2021, we face the following conditions: a vaccine roll out that sometime between now and late ‘21 will lead us into a v-shaped recovery. The Krugman argument for this vision, and The Bloomberg argument for this vision. We also just had the Fed reaffirm 0% interest rates and the continuation of QE. Add to all of that very easy YoY earnings comps for the first two quarters of this year and this is not a recipe for a crash, it’s a recipe for a steady market melt up. Where are the rich supposed to put all their money in a 0% interest rate environment? 0% pushes up the value of all asset classes, and this is especially true of real estate and stonks. Generally speaking, predicting macro economic movements is a losing game, but all of those things combined with the easy YoY comps means I don’t feel the need to be concerned of an impending correction for at least the next two quarters.
A much smaller factor but still a factor, I have seen it suggested that Apple will be among the larger beneficiaries of the stimulus checks going out, although those have not started rolling out until just now so that may have an impact on Q2 if any.
Bad subscription numbers
If subscriptions to Apple One flopped, this could significantly overshadow sales and earnings numbers. I personally feel Apple isn’t likely to seriously miscalculate predictions on a subscription bundle because they have their market dialed in, but I don’t know that for sure.
Sales could have cratered in October
Sales often drop a little in the weeks preceding a phone launch. What if phone sales tanked during the delays waiting for an iPhone 12? That could be bad. I’m encouraged by the fact that iPhone 11 models appeared to still be having good sales numbers when the iPhone 12 was launched (see links earlier in this post), but I don’t really know what October sales look like.
COVID could have tanked all phone sales.
This report says all phone activations generally tanked 23% on Christmas Day. Two thoughts I have on that, that number is for all phone activations, not just iPhones. And two, that’s just for Christmas Day itself. There could be a wide array of reasons activations were down on that one day. To counter that, this report says the iPhone was the best selling 5G phone, even in October despite the phone not launching until the second half of that month. Additionally that article mentions pent up demand for 5G apple phones that sales are likely to be strong going forward.

Technical Analysis

I don’t believe in technical analysis. Charts don’t know any of the things I just explained, and are therefore, in my opinion, useless to me. Maybe somebody has figured out a system for charts to predict the future, but I am not that person.

Price Target

I don’t pretend to know things like that.

Fun rumors

I’m not big on speculative rumors and momentum type plays, but if that’s your thing there are certainly rumors in the air. The most famous of which is the rumor that Apple is back to working seriously on an EV Car. Another is reports are just coming out in the last day or two that Apple is seeing new successes in developing foldable tech. Whether these things will impact the stock price isn’t really my cup of tea, but if it’s yours those are two things to consider.

Is my post an attempt at a WSB pump and dump?

I’m under no allusions that my own WSB post is going to alter the trajectory of a $2.25 trillion company in any meaningful way. That sort of thing may work on a post-IPO company that hasn’t had its lockup expiration yet and thus has a tiny float (aka PLTR or numerous other recent “to the moon” meme stocks) with limited float. (That’s not to say those aren’t great companies or great trades. I’m just sayin’).

My positions:

I’m more conservative than most of WSB. While I love this place with all my heart and love you guys for it, I believe risking it all to chase screenshot-worthy gains is moronic and not the path to building real, long-term wealth. Thus my positions are probably more conservative than you’d expect.
I have 20% of my net worth tied up in Apple via LEAPs. 9/16/2022 AAPL $87.50 calls. I consider this to be essentially stock I hold for the long term. Delta is approaching 1 anyway so they practically are stock. Sometime in the depths of March I loaded up on FAANG LEAPs with the intention of actually holding them for years and then converting to shares. Those LEAPs were a little OTM at the time I bought them. I have no interest in day trading my significant LEAP positions so that’s going to sit there for the next two years.
But I also have put an additional 15% of my net worth into short term calls on Apple to play the ER. I have Feb 19 $130 calls which were about 10-15% OTM at the time I bought them. They are currently ITM. I also have 1/29 $135s and 1/29 $141s.
This puts 35% of my net worth into Apple.

How to get rich

I intend to cash out my short term calls after the ER, and I don’t intend to reinvest or roll them out because I suspect Apple will be fully valued by then and there are better plays out there. I intend to keep my LEAPS because I bought those for the very long term and because at the very least I should hold them until March to hit the long term capital gains tax rate.
I intend to take my profits from the calls and push them into shorting NNOX and XPEV, both of which have significant lockup expirations coming in mid to late February which I believe will significantly impact the stock prices in the short term. I have no interest in shorting XPEV right now, because you guys are crazy as fuck and for all I know EV stonks could all run up another 50% in the next month. Right about the time the Apple ER hits should be perfect.

Criticism

If you think I’m wrong, I would strongly encourage you to comment. I don’t give a fuck about looking correct or saving face but I give many fucks about not losing money. If I’m wrong, I want to know it.

The Most Important Factor

This ain’t my first day around here, and I know that DD is absolutely useless without rocketships, therefore: APPLE TO THE 🌙 🚀 🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀 🚀 🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀 🚀 🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀 🚀 🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀 🚀 🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀 🚀 🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀 🚀 🚀🚀🚀🚀.
Godspeed, fellow autists.

Hardware:
I think the smartest defensive move Facebook can make at this stage is doing whatever it takes to become a major player in consumer hardware. Even if they breakeven, or lose money on this endeavor it can be treated as user acquisition costs for the people who wouldn't make a Facebook account otherwise, or as a way to make Facebook accounts as sticky as possible to protect against people leaving the platform. Anecdotally, I've seen people that have preached "Facebook is evil" for years, say that not they will not ever delete their newly open accounts because if they did their Oculus hardware wouldn't work, and they'd lose all of their purchases.
Facebook is dominating the growing VR market with an iron fist. Non-advertising revenue grew 156% in Q4, and IDC estimates 3 million Quest 2's were sold in Q4. Oculus Quest 2 has stellar reviews, despite the mandatory Facebook account for use. Facebook's VR devices also use Messenger for messages, Workplace for enterprise, and I believe Facebook Horizon (which is integrated with the FB app) will eventually be the place users load into initially, and launch third party apps from.
High investment cost makes it unlikely that other social media company can compete with Facebook in hardware (especially AVR), and this should give Facebook a permanent utility advantage against its peers. The companies that could compete, big tech, and gaming giants seem unwilling to make the investment to compete. I think they're aware that Facebook is completely fine making $0 to be dominant in the VR space, and that's scared them away in addition to facts like VR being a relatively small market for them.Apple is rumored to be considering a release of a Quest-like headset in later 2022, but the device will be priced far above $1000 according to Mark Gurman.
VR is where I'm most confident in Facebook's ability to achieve its hardware dreams, but consumer AR is also an area where its only competition in terms of investments made is Apple. So I think their chances there are decent too. Facebook is working on long term AR glasses, but is also releasing Smartglasses in collaboration with Luxottica (Ray-Ban and Oakley) this year. There's also Facebook's line of smart video chatting devices, Portal.
Traditionally Listed Moats
Intangible assets consisting of the vast amount of data users have shared: sustained and growing, but people are also sharing things about themselves on other apps increasingly.
Growth of users means network effects still growing
Number and diversity of advertisers, and advertiser verticals still growing
Competition?
There is rising social media competition, and always the threat of new entrants. That being said, competition seems to carve out niches, so they aren't competing as directly as we'd think. The closest thing to Facebook the Blue app, for connecting with family and friends is Instagram. Competing apps can have similar features, but the main utilities are different. Tik Tok is mostly a short video app, Youtube is a long video app, Twitter is a breaking news app, Reddit is a communities app, etc. Facebook's utility first and foremost is connecting with REAL people who's identity you can verify, like friends and family. Like previously mentioned, the closest competitor is Instagram.
Messaging
There can be lack of differentiation here, but Messenger tied to Facebook, Instagram, Portal and Oculus. I suspect it'll be tied to future hardware as well. Whatsapp has network effects, and may one day have lock-in comparable to Chinese super apps (at least that's what's being worked towards). iMessage is the the main competitor here, because they are automatically installed on every iPhone
Misc
I think Facebook Marketplace, the Craigslist alternative benefits greatly from Facebook using real identities, and is an overall better product. If you want to sell something locally FB Marketplace is the best option, and I think it's a strong reason to have an account. Usage of Marketplace is growing.
The integration with Jio in India, and importance in Indian society is worth mentioning for Whatsapp.
Facebook Groups, have competition in the form of Reddit, and Discord. The edge here will be real identities, and the tools they are building to make moderating a Facebook group profitable (subscriptions, etc)
The only other pure "Real Identity social network" is Linkedin is a professional network.
Problems
No young people use Facebook? This seems to be a US centric cliche, as Facebook is popular among all age demographics around the world. According to Pew Research 76% of people 18-24 use Facebook, only superseded by Youtube. For teens in 2018, 51% of teens used Facebook which is good in my opinion for a social network not targeted to teens like Tik Tok. I personally think the utility of Facebook kicks in after college age, but regardless if there is a problem, I think the cure can be User Acquisition through hardware.
Chance of mass exodus? again, mitigated by the lock-in of hardware, but this is a concern of mine based on Facebook's reputation. 1. Privacy, there is truth to some criticism here, because Facebook's business model does depend on data collection, and in many ways is opposed to strict definitions of privacy, but much of it is also pushed by myth like "Facebook sells data". Facebook has the same business model as its advertising funded peers, but perception is what matters, and Facebook is losing the perception battle. 2. Politics, In my opinion has been half of Facebook's reputation problem. Recently Zuck said that they are trying to make Facebook less political by not recommending political groups, and lowering reach on political posts. Also, Donald Trump being gone should make the next 4 years less politically controversial. Since Facebook is in the business of advertising, and people can mostly say what they want, there's always the small chance of a #DeleteFacebook movement reaching critical mass based on these themes.
Being banned in countries? Mitigated by becoming a hardware player, but this is an unlikely outcome for many reasons that my hands are too tired to elaborate on.
Apple's privacy stance and iOS 14: The hit to revenue estimates I've seen are between 1%-7%, but it could also be a boost to revenue since third party signals being reduced will give the edge to whoever has the best first party signals, we'll have wait to see. This is something to watch closely, but transferring third party data into first party data by having ecommerce on the platform through initiatives like Facebooks shops, and Instagram shopping can be the cure. Also, being in control of hardware mitigates this risk
Antitrust- generally not concerned
Privacy as a theme that is adversarial to advertising - slightly concerned but I don't think ad funded business models are going anywhere, many people like not paying for things
Might add more to this later...

Hardware:
I think the smartest defensive move Facebook can make at this stage is doing whatever it takes to become a major player in consumer hardware. Even if they breakeven, or lose money on this endeavor it can be treated as user acquisition costs for the people who wouldn't make a Facebook account otherwise, or as a way to make Facebook accounts as sticky as possible to protect against people leaving the platform. Anecdotally, I've seen people that have preached "Facebook is evil" for years, say that not they will not ever delete their newly open accounts because if they did their Oculus hardware wouldn't work, and they'd lose all of their purchases.
Facebook is dominating the growing VR market with an iron fist. Non-advertising revenue grew 156% in Q4, and IDC estimates 3 million Quest 2's were sold in Q4. Oculus Quest 2 has stellar reviews, despite the mandatory Facebook account for use. Facebook's VR devices also use Messenger for messages, Workplace for enterprise, and I believe Facebook Horizon (which is integrated with the FB app) will eventually be the place users load into initially, and launch third party apps from.
High investment cost makes it unlikely that other social media company can compete with Facebook in hardware (especially AVR), and this should give Facebook a permanent utility advantage against its peers. The companies that could compete, big tech, and gaming giants seem unwilling to make the investment to compete. I think they're aware that Facebook is completely fine making $0 to be dominant in the VR space, and that's scared them away in addition to facts like VR being a relatively small market for them.Apple is rumored to be considering a release of a Quest-like headset in later 2022, but the device will be priced far above $1000 according to Mark Gurman.
VR is where I'm most confident in Facebook's ability to achieve its hardware dreams, but consumer AR is also an area where its only competition in terms of investments made is Apple. So I think their chances there are decent too. Facebook is working on long term AR glasses, but is also releasing Smartglasses in collaboration with Luxottica (Ray-Ban and Oakley) this year. There's also Facebook's line of smart video chatting devices, Portal.
Traditionally Listed Moats
Intangible assets consisting of the vast amount of data users have shared: sustained and growing, but people are also sharing things about themselves on other apps increasingly.
Growth of users means network effects still growing
Number and diversity of advertisers, and advertiser verticals still growing
Competition?
There is rising social media competition, and always the threat of new entrants. That being said, competition seems to carve out niches, so they aren't competing as directly as we'd think. The closest thing to Facebook the Blue app, for connecting with family and friends is Instagram. Competing apps can have similar features, but the main utilities are different. Tik Tok is mostly a short video app, Youtube is a long video app, Twitter is a breaking news app, Reddit is a communities app, etc. Facebook's utility first and foremost is connecting with REAL people who's identity you can verify, like friends and family. Like previously mentioned, the closest competitor is Instagram.
Messaging
There can be lack of differentiation here, but Messenger tied to Facebook, Instagram, Portal and Oculus. I suspect it'll be tied to future hardware as well. Whatsapp has network effects, and may one day have lock-in comparable to Chinese super apps (at least that's what's being worked towards). iMessage is the the main competitor here, because they are automatically installed on every iPhone
Misc
I think Facebook Marketplace, the Craigslist alternative benefits greatly from Facebook using real identities, and is an overall better product. If you want to sell something locally FB Marketplace is the best option, and I think it's a strong reason to have an account. Usage of Marketplace is growing.
The integration with Jio in India, and importance in Indian society is worth mentioning for Whatsapp.
Facebook Groups, have competition in the form of Reddit, and Discord. The edge here will be real identities, and the tools they are building to make moderating a Facebook group profitable (subscriptions, etc)
The only other pure "Real Identity social network" is Linkedin is a professional network.
Problems
No young people use Facebook? This seems to be a US centric cliche, as Facebook is popular among all age demographics around the world. According to Pew Research 76% of people 18-24 use Facebook, only superseded by Youtube. For teens in 2018, 51% of teens used Facebook which is good in my opinion for a social network not targeted to teens like Tik Tok. I personally think the utility of Facebook kicks in after college age, but regardless if there is a problem, I think the cure can be User Acquisition through hardware.
Chance of mass exodus? again, mitigated by the lock-in of hardware, but this is a concern of mine based on Facebook's reputation. 1. Privacy, there is truth to some criticism here, because Facebook's business model does depend on data collection, and in many ways is opposed to strict definitions of privacy, but much of it is also pushed by myth like "Facebook sells data". Facebook has the same business model as its advertising funded peers, but perception is what matters, and Facebook is losing the perception battle. 2. Politics, In my opinion has been half of Facebook's reputation problem. Recently Zuck said that they are trying to make Facebook less political by not recommending political groups, and lowering reach on political posts. Also, Donald Trump being gone should make the next 4 years less politically controversial. Since Facebook is in the business of advertising, and people can mostly say what they want, there's always the small chance of a #DeleteFacebook movement reaching critical mass based on these themes.
Being banned in countries? Mitigated by becoming a hardware player, but this is an unlikely outcome for many reasons that my hands are too tired to elaborate on.
Apple's privacy stance and iOS 14: The hit to revenue estimates I've seen are between 1%-7%, but it could also be a boost to revenue since third party signals being reduced will give the edge to whoever has the best first party signals, we'll have wait to see. This is something to watch closely, but transferring third party data into first party data by having ecommerce on the platform through initiatives like Facebooks shops, and Instagram shopping can be the cure. Also, being in control of hardware mitigates this risk
Antitrust- generally not concerned
Privacy as a theme that is adversarial to advertising - slightly concerned but I don't think ad funded business models are going anywhere, many people like not paying for things
Might add more to this later...

Hey guys, it’s Coooolin ! How was everyone’s day!? :) Hope you all had a wonderful one! Let me know how it was downn belooww! :)
Here are the new cards for today, Thanks EA! :)

Silver Master Icons

Rob Blake - 91 OVR - LAK / RD - H and S² , SPE² ... 89 SPEED , 92 with DIS + SPE
Ted Lindsay - 91 OVR - DET / LW - BAL² , T² .. 89 FO with T
Bernie Parent - 91 OVR - PHI / G - 5’10” / 170 lbs - SPA² , SWA² ... yuck
— Set needs 9 Icons + Bronze Icon to upgrade to Silver —
——-

Primetimes

NHL

Ryan O’Reilly - 90 OVR - STL / C - LTL¹ , T¹ ... 97 FOs - Without Thief!!
Seymon Varlamov - 88 OVR - NYI / G - 6’2” / 215 lbs - H and S¹ , SPA¹
Tom Wilson - 87 OVR - WAS / RW - GLA¹ , WM¹
Erik Cernak - 87 OVR - TBL / RD - HOW¹ , WH¹
Fredrik Anderson - 86 OVR - TOR / G - 6’4” / 230 lbs - BAR¹ , SWA¹
Clayton Keller - 86 OVR - ARI / C - PP¹ , MAG¹
Anthony Cirelli - 85 OVR - TBL / C - SPE¹ , SH¹
Matt Martin - 84 OVR - NYI / LW - HOW¹ , WH¹
Jack Roslovic - 84 OVR - CBJ / C - LTL¹ , SPE¹
Mike Smith - 84 OVR - EDM / G - 6’4” / 220 lbs - DIS¹ , SPA¹ .... oh babyy
Tyler Ennis - 81 OVR - EDM / LW - GLA¹ , WM¹
Alexander Kerfoot - 81 OVR - TOR / C - PP¹ , SPE¹
• • • • • • • • • • - - - - - - - - - • • • • • • • • • • • •

Packs Available

23H 40M
• Jumbo Elite Pack - 50k C / 1k P
20 items , with at least 11 80+ OVR Players
• Mega Pack - 37.5k C / 750 P
30 items, at least 15 Gold Players, and 4 80+ OVR Players
• Players Pack - 15k C / 300 P
10 items, all Players, at least 5 Gold Players and 1 80+ OVR Player

P.S.

• Rivals Resets Today
• More Bold Cards

Hockey News

• Koivu Retires
• NHL postpones more games

Stock Market News

• Why Pot Stocks are Flyying!
• Stock Dip after Reaching Record Highs!

Other News

• National Pizza Day
• Today in History
——————

What’s to Come?

• SB Season Reset - Wednesday at 5pm EST
• Rivals Rewards - Wednesday at 5pm EST
• HUT Champ Rewards - Wednesday at 6am EST
• SB Rewards !! - Thursday at 5pm EST
• New Event !! - Friday at 5pm EST
—————

Summary of the day

Quick Read
Best Forward of the Day - PT - is RYAN O’REILLYY OVR 90 with the syn LIGHTT the LAMPP and THIEFF
Best Defence of the Day - PT - is ERIKK CERNAKK OVR 87 with the syn HOWITZERR and WORKK HORSEE
• Rivals Resets ! Where did you place?
———— —— ———

Important Notice

Day by day may seem like nothing changes, but when you look back a lot has changed.
Take risks. Do what makes you happy. Smile more. Laugh more. Have fun!!
Don’t take life too seriously , and yourself too seriously.. learn to have fun!! Learn to laugh at yourself if you did something dumb, your mistakes, etc.,
Life is way too short to just sit and wait... when you can make a difference and big change in your life today!
—-

Interested in Stocks?

EA’s Stock Price, after hours - Feb 9
$ 146.11 (usd) —- Currency Converter
we looked at the stock at $137.54 usd
—— That is a difference of ( $8.57 / 6.23% ) —
Disclaimer - I am not a financial advisor. It is your money, please do your own due diligence. I am not responsible for your money. This is *not** advice. I added this section for an added educational purposes only. Thanks*
—— —— —— —-

NEED A SOUNDTRACK TO LISTEN TO?

• I made this for everyone. I’ll update it whenever I feel like it, but its been often!

WE’RE AT 1400 SONGS! WOW! How are you not listening to this playlist already!?
Comment songs to add, and please give feedback! It’s much appreciated!!
I currently have “Speechless” by “Dan + Shay” stuck in my head.... which you can play, recently added to the playlist!
Sidenote - How do you guys like the playlist!? I have a friend who makes music...and I really want to surprise him with some new people listening to his music... if you wanna help me, please click Here!! it would mean a lot to me!!
———-

Sites To Bookmark!

If you click here you will be redirected to bilasport. Bilasport is the best Online Streaming site for your entertainment needs for all sports! (Not affiliated)
A great streaming source recommended by NHLStreams is SurgeSport. Click on Hockey and you’ll be good to go!
Want to make your dream team, and show others what you’ve been working on, and much more? I will redirect you HERE!.
Here’s a helpful pack guide for you! Click!
Want to know how the market is holding up? With a simple TAP! you will be on the newly fresh made website for the HUT market, made by one of the guys on the sub!
.... what do the stats on a card mean? Is my card I want / pulled good? Click here to find out!!
When is my favourite team playing? When do they play!? Here you can click on this link, and tap on your favourite team. From there, tap “Schedule” . You can add this to your homescreen on iPhone by clicking the square with the upwards arrow, scrolling down, and tapping “Add to Home Screen”
——- —— —— —— —— —— —— —— —- —— —-

Fighting a Gambling Addiction?

Don’t feel scared to click here. Winning is SO much louder than losing. Know that you are NEVER alone. We are all here for eachother, and it is never too late to get help. I am here for you.
This is a VERY important thread, especially if you are new to HUT. Here!

Colin’s Thoughts

I got accepted to a College for Business - Accounting !! :) Super excited to see where this leads me!
4 other Colleges to respond back! :) Yay!
Also, mighttt have a job at Home Depot! All depends if they phone me back or not, and look at it!! I’m so stoked !
——-
40 / 365
—— —— —— —- —- ——- —- —— ——
Thanks for reading.
I’m always welcome to feedback, please let me know what I can improve on.
If there’s anything missing, please let me know!
Take care, happy gaming! HAPPY NATIONAL PIZZA DAY!!
• Coolin Killin It
(Life is like a puzzle, you just have to find the right piece.)

Shout out to u/Misanthropia for the original post — the hive needed more updated art!
This list is current as of episode 233 (2/1/21)
Desus goes by numerous aliases on the Bodega Boys Podcast. These aliases are based on references to pop culture, sports, and hip-hop. The long and ever-changing list of aliases or "AKAs" are one of the many running gags on the show. During an interview with Method Man on Desus and Mero, Desus explained that the idea for aliases was based on the alter-egos of the rappers in the song "Wu-Gambinos" on the album Only Built 4 Cuban Linx... by Wu-Tang Clan member Raekwon. (info via Wikipedia)
Desus & Mero no longer record from Milk Studios (moved indefinitely) and have been recording the podcast remotely from home due to the pandemic. Most of the AKA’s now mention social distancing, hot takes on covid and store closures.

Desus

Desus is extremely consistent with his aliases, almost always presenting them in the exact same order and without any exclusions:
Desus Nice — In a Hot 97 interview on April 13th 2017, Desus explains that people started calling him Desus as a play on his government name, "Daniel", and "Jesus", because he worked miracles with people's computers
Young Chipotle — Desus’ original alias, he explains in one podcast that it originates from when he was broke and buying Chipotle was a genuine treat
Pockets stay fat like Terio (Pockets stay fat like 'here we go') — A reference to viral star Terio, a young, obese African American boy whose videos of him dancing launched him to very brief viral fame. Recently, Desus added the more politically correct and kid friendly “here we go”
Eli Litby — A play on Eli Whitney, inventor of the cotton gin
Boutros Boutros Gully — A play on Boutros Boutros-Ghali, former Secretary-General of the UN, “Gully” being Jamaican Patois for an impoverished area
Slobodan Might-know-ya-bitch — A play on Slobodan Milosevic, former President of Serbia and important player in the Bosnian War
Young Day Party — I believe this was adopted in the summer of 2016 after Desus recounted the story of a day party in D.C., which seemed to invigorate his love for partying during the day
Young Hot Take — He has hot takes, pretty obvious here
Desus H. Fuego — Another moniker to describe his hot (“fuego”) takes on topics
Mr. Nandos with a rando — Nandos is a portuguese chicken restaurant chain which originated in South Africa and is big in the UK and Australia. Rando is slang for random person. Having Nandos with a rando is eating chicken with a random person (credit to u/deweez)
Mr. Mil Novecientos Noventa Y Cuatro en Nueva York — In later episodes Desus rarely adds the “en Nueva York” bit, but it translates to “Mr. 1994 in New York”. "The Knicks team in 1994 made the finals and is a legendary team amongst all Knicks fans who were around at the time. That team got to game 7 of the finals against the Rockets. NYC rallied around that team hard body because that team absolutely embodied NYC to a T with guys like Ewing, Charles Oakley, Mason, Starks, and Derek Harper." (credit to u/Okieant33)
Mikhail Goin-off — derived from former Soviet leader Mikhail Gorbachev (credit to u/GhettoFob) converged with an allusion to losing ones temper in an act of random violence.
The Jouvert Boss — “Jouvert” is a carnival held in Caribbean/West Indian culture, involving a lot of partying
MC Likkle Gungo Pea — Gungo pea is a type of peas (also known as pigeon peas) often used in Jamaican dishes. Reference to his Jamaican heritage (credit to u/hopelessromcom)
"Pullin' up from 40 with your shorty" — Desus will “pull up”, or make a pass at, your girl even when the odds are slim or unlikely, much like a 40 foot shot in basketball
"Don’t talk to me in the Uber Pool, I don’t know you" — Uber introduced a service where you can share rides with other Uber users for a discounted rate. Desus has expressed his reluctance to engage with strangers when he is using it
The original “my plus one got a plus one so don’t make a fuss son” — When Desus shows up to an event with a girl, he brings two, and he's intimating that the host shouldn’t have a problem with that
Desus Rothstein, the Jamaican Jew — Originated around when Mero began his house search in Bergen County, NJ where a number of wealthy people of Jewish descent live. Desus envisions a version of himself who would fit in there
Jermaine Avocado Toast — Desus has gotten more cultured as a result of their success, and as such he has been able to indulge in things usually enjoyed by privileged white people, a stereotypical example of that being avocado toast. This is Desus’ gentrified, hipster persona
Young PA — Possible reference to the sound of small amount of air being expelled from a loose butthole, which is an impression Mero occasionally does (credit to u/jimsternub). This is also a reference to Brooklyn rapper Young MA.
The Ghost of Mufasa — A reference to Lion King, but beyond that I have no idea why he adopted it. Still hilarious though, and the nickname that most often makes Mero laugh
Young Charcuterie without the coonery — Charcuterie is considered very hip and trendy right now, and Desus is again saying he has a taste for the finer things, but is no longer interested in “coonery”, a derogatory term used to describe stereotypical African American behavior
Chile Limon, the left handed reliever for the Yankee’s (Que lo que?) — A fictional persona that seems to be a Latino version of Dock Ellis, who famously threw a no hitter while high on Acid. Chile Limon is also a popular seasoning/flavor with the Latino community
3 Phone Jones — Desus originally adopted "2 Phone Jones" after he reluctantly bought an iPhone to go with his Samsung Galaxy. He then received a Google Pixel, making it 3 Phone Jones (credit to u/ArtSorr0w)
Desus Ex Machina — A play on the common plot device “deus ex machina”, or “god from the machine” in which an unsolvable problem is suddenly resolved by some unexpected intervention. Desus also used to have a tumblr entitled "Desus Ex Machina" (credit to u/hardcore9)
Jay Chuckles — Revealed in episode 55 to be a reference to a now-defunct shoe store in NYC. Did Desus read this thread?
Stanley Cups — Desus' former rap alias, as revealed in episode 53.
The Human Dr. Bronner’s Label (Dilute! Dilute! Dilute!) — A reference to the concentrated soap Dr. Bronner’s Castile soap, which needs to be diluted. I didn’t quite understand how Desus applied this to himself, but it came from a joke in Episode 51 or 52 about Sean Spicer trying to defray controversy surrounding President Trump's decisions
Dionardo DiTrappio — A play on “Leonardo DiCaprio”, the actor, but referencing “trapping”, a slang for selling drugs.
Mr. 240p because I like my Pino blurry — Desus longs for the days of very low resolution pornography. 240p refers to the resolution, which is extremely low by modern standards
DJ Woolite AKA You're listening to Washed FM up next we got 24 hours of — The host of the fictional station “Washed FM”, a fictional radio station that is sometimes referenced along with “WSMK, Smack City Radio”. Woolite is a brand of fabric softener. Desus said multiple times on the podcast that now that he's single and living alone, he washes his clothes with extra fabric softener. As a kid, his clothes would get washed and be hard as nails. Again, he's got a taste for the finer things in life. (credit to u/Okieant33)
The Curried G.O.A.T. — A double reference to Desus’s Jamaican heritage, where Curried Goat is a popular culinary item, as well as referencing the phrase “G.O.A.T”, short for “greatest of all time”
Desus Spicer — A play on the former White House Press Secretary, Sean Spicer, who is often referenced on Desus & Mero as “spicing up” or “adding spice” to his takes
Jamal Hashburn — A play on Jamal Mashburn, a former NBA player, about Hash
The Bronx Celine Dion — Refers to the fact that Celine Dion is very popular in the Jamaican community, and so Desus is like Celine, but from the Bronx. (credit to u/chefboyardu) This is especially present with foreign and immigrant culture which means he is of mogul or iconic status for the Bronx (credit to u/courtofdacrimsonking)
Wray and Nephew's Nephew — A play on J. Wray and Nephew rum, which has its origins in Jamaica like Desus. Also, Desus drinks a lot, which you probably should have figured out by now. Introduced in episode 58
The Moreno you can't contain-o — A play on "moreno", a Spanish term for someone with dark skin
The Human Meme, Word to Ja — A play on Ja Rule's infamous mistake of believing that the word "meme" is pronounced "may-may"
Young Erewhon — A reference to a bourgeois health food store in LA, which makes this nickname in the vein of "Jermaine Avocado Toast", demonstrating Desus' taste for finer things now. (credit to u/a-1-since-day-1)
The Racist Provocateur — Desus flipped an angry tweet from April 28th 2017, in which someone called him a "racist provocateur" into a new alias
Henrik Bud-qvist — A play on NHL goalie Henrik Lundqvist, who currently plays for the New York Rangers
Nelson Bang-dela — An old alias resurrected in episode 65, a play on South African civil right's icon Nelson Mandela
Sergio Can't-see-me — A play on Sergio Tacchini, an Italian fashion designer and former Tennis player
Vladimir Boofin' — A play on Russian president Vladimir Putin, "boofin" being a reference to smuggling something by sticking it inside one's rectum
The Human Werther's, melting in your mouth — A reference to Werther's Originals, a brand of caramel hard candies favored by old people. Not really sure what this one means otherwise.
Mr. Becks on Deckington — The first time Desus introduced this one, he accidentally said "Mr. Becky's on Deckington" which was an incredible Freudian slip since Desus has been accused of not being into black women, and "Becky" is the stereotypical white woman name in pop culture. This is a reference to Desus always drinking Beck's, a cheap beer he favors along with Heineken. Adding "-ington" to words is New York slang, as Mero explains at some point.
Rikki-Tikki-Squad-bi — A play on Rikki-Tikki-Tavi, a character from the Jungle Book
Greg "Paaa"-povitch — A very meta play on San Antonio Spur's head coach Greg Popovich and the onomatopoeia of spreading butt cheeks apart (according to Mero)
Morris "Say it with your chest"-nut — A play on actor Morris Chestnut
Mahatma Gone-B — A play on famed pacifist Mahatma Gandi
Not Macka B but I got the cucumber — A reference to a viral video in which Reggae artist Macka B raps about healthy food in his "medical monday" series, Desus is unsurprisingly referencing his penis
The juices are pressed but your boy never is — Being "pressed" means someone is applying pressure to you, and no one would do that to Desus. The juices he is talking about are probably the morning drink he has with lemongrass and cayenne pepper that he makes reference to many times in recent episodes of the podcast.
I am the Art, dammit! — Not sure if this is a reference to anything specific or just a Kanye-esque line a crazed creative might yell out at some point
The Don Dada Ganoush — I believe this is a reference to the Meditteranean dish Baba Ganoush, "Don Dada" is Jamaican Patois slang (I believe) for “top pimp” or “big player” and a sort-of homophone for "baba"
No more Cup of Noodles — I don't know if this is a reference beyond the fact that Cup of Noodles is a struggle meal and Desus is no longer struggling
The Prince of Peckham — A reference to Peckham, a diverse neighborhood in London
The Fashion Nova Casanova — Fashion Nova is an online clothing retailer that specifically targets curvy women that Desus and Mero reference pejoratively (saying it's for bottle waitresses), Desus is saying here that he excels at seducing these kind of women ("Casanova" is a term of a man who excels at seducing women derived from the name of Italian Giacomo Casanova)
"William H. 5 Cent, 10 Cent, Dolla... Forget the small change, give me the the big money wine" — A reference to Soca Boys song "Dollar Wine (one cent, five cent, ten cent, dollar)" which apparently was super popular in the West Indies. "William H Holla is something Jay-Z used to call himself back in his hey day. It comes from the fact that Bill Gates' full name is William Henry Gates. Jay-Z used to give himself nicknames back in the day. J-Hova caught on but he used the term William H Holla because Jay-Z also coined the phrase "Holla At Me" and "Holla Back" and just shortened it to "Holla". So put the two together and you have William H Holla. He first said it on the song "Stick to the Script" off the Dynasty album. So Desus took it and made it his own." (credit to u/Okieant33)
The only anthem I salute is Dipset — A reference to the ongoing national anthem protests in the NFL, Desus is saying the only anthem he salutes is "Dipset Anthem" by Harlem rap legends The Diplomats
Mister Sauga, Catch me at Square One Top Left. Mans is marved. (Dont cheese me bro) — Finally a Canadian-centric reference, which makes sense given that the Bodega Boys have performed there multiple times. This is a reference to the Square One Shopping Center in Mississauga, Canada (where Desus alleges his mysterious wife and kids live), and "top left" is Greater Toronto Area slang for "truthful" or "seriously". "Mans is marved", means "I'm hungry" in Toronto slang (credit to u/Fortehlulz33)
Trill Rizzuto, holy cow! — A reference to former Yankees player Phil Rizzuto who would later go on to be a commentator, where his trademark expression was "holy cow!"
Mister Soft Palms because all I do is count checks and jerk off — I don't know if this is a reference to anything except Desus bragging about his lifestyle
"We got OJ, uh purple stuff, soda, and it's me! Sunny D!" — A reference to an old Sunny D commercial (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MQE3jWYuGiw), and a play on the fact that people likely used to called Desus by the nickname "D", so "it's me! Sunny D" would be like saying "it's me, Desus!". Also kind of ironic since Desus is not a particularly sunny person (cue Dark Desus).
David Yerp-man — A play on David Yurman, an expensive jewelry company, and NYC slang exclamation "yerp"
Desus-expensive, Desus-Red Bottoms, Desus-bloody shoes — A play on a lyric from fellow Bronx native Cardi B taken from her song "Bodak Yellow"
Smo-a-kim Noah — A play on NBA player Joaquim Noah who played for the Knicks
Andrew Coooooool-nanan — A reference to serial killer (most notable for killing Gianni Versace) Andrew Cunanan
The Junior Energy God, come sit down 'pon me charger — Originally just the "Energy God" until Desus realized that that was fellow Jamaican Elephant Man's aliases. I thiiiink this is referring to the phrase "bring the same energy", the idea that if one is saying something behind someone's back, when confronted by the individual they should stick to their original statements. This alias started after the infamous Desus & Mero visit to the Breakfast Club, in which DJ Envy accosted the boys about a joke they made about his wife. Desus & Mero didn't punk out and therefore "brought the same energy". Someone tell me if I'm reaching here.
Call me PetCo cause I got your bitch-on-freeze — A play on words for the dog breed Bichon Frise
The Topic of Gossip in Syosset (Shout out to 11791 ah ah ah) — Syosset (zip code 11791) is a town in Long Island, NY. it's real bougie and suburban so Desus is saying basically he's got reach and is known not just in the hood but in the wealthy burbs too (credit to u/terminal-chillness)
Grandpa Joe, When you see Charlie you see me don't touch that golden ticket — A direct reference to Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (Grandpa Joe) and Desus's cats name (Charlie)
Dead Eye Desus (Mornin’ Sherrif) — Dead Eye Desus refers to the 2018 video game Red Dead Redemption 2. The game features a gameplay mechanic called "Dead Eye" that allows the player to slow time to achieve easy head shots and kills. The game is also set in the late 1800's, early 1900's in the old West, which is why Desus typically references a Sheriff after saying Dead Eye Desus. (credit to u/biggak)
Mr. Shopping at StreetEasy with a bad breezy like I'm Yeezy, please believe me — Another one of Desus' tongue twisters, this one is in reference to shopping at StreetEasy, a NYC real estate website with an attractive woman like Kanye West might do
The Black Asiatic who will crack your back like an automatic craftmatic — Added in episode 54 after Desus' continuing gag about "big Black Asiatic men" (often referencing their penises). Here Desus is implying that sex with him (a Black Asiatic man) is very vigorous by saying he will change your posture like a Craftmatic mattress, which is a brand of mattress whose shape and orientation can be controlled electronically
Mr. La Marina in a mesh Merina with a fresh misdemeanor and a cold demeanor — This one is a doozy, but was adopted after Desus mentioned his frequent trips to La Marina (a bar on the water in Manhattan) in episodes released in the summer of 2016. A mesh Merina is a a mesh tank top (I think). The other two parts are self explanatory. Not sure how he always gets this one right without mixing up the words.
The Sheet-Mask Killer (No one could be iller) — ??
The Black Zack Morris of Port Morris — A take on Zack Morris for his problematic schemes on Saved by the Bell. (credit to u/justic3bon3r) Port Morris is a neighborhood in the Bronx (credit to u/m9rockstar) home of The Bronx Brewery and Bodega Boys Beer
Young KPI — Desus recites lyrics by Depeche Mode “Personal Jesus” (1989) More than likely this is a play off his main alias (Personal Desus)
The Pelé of Peleton — Pelé (Edson Arantes do Nascimento) was a former Brazilian soccer player and considered one of the greats. Desus is an avid Peleton user so much he deems himself the greatest of all time
Your problematic bae — Desus occasionally says problematic things, but you still love him, hence him being your “bae”. He always ends with this one, followed by an exaggerated kissing sound.
*After Desus's last aka he gives some sort of problematic advice sometimes followed by explosions*

Mero

Mero (u/THE_KID_MERO) is far less consistent with his aliases. Depending upon how smacked he is, he will often exclude or repeat some of his aliases. He also adds them far less frequently than Desus.
The Kid Mero — In a Hot 97 interview on April 13th 2017, Mero explained that this alias comes from the fact that his father and uncle wanted to name him "Ramiro", but his mother vetoed it and named him "Joel". His father and uncle continued to call him "Ramiro", which was shortened to "Miro" as a nickname. When Mero started tagging, he changed Miro to Mero because he found E to be a nicer letter to write (credit to u/atorMMM) as well as he just didn't like how the "i" looked. Also tagging the name "Ramiro" that long would get you arrested
The Human Durag Flap — Mero’s original nickname, and a reference to how hood he is and his uncircumcised status, something that gets referenced very often (credit u/ZeddyG2 and u/chandlersokay)
Curve Gotti — A play on “Irv Gotti”, former boss of Murder, Inc. records
Donovan Mcdabb — A play on former NFL player Donovan Mcnabb, in reference to dabbing, which could have two meanings (smoking THC oil or the dance move created by the Migos)
Trizz Khalifa — A play on “Wiz Khalifa”, but substituting the first part of the name with the slang “Trizz”. Usually said in a fake patois, imitating Popcaan's cry of "Fuck Wiz Khalifa!" at a Mixpak event
SKKRRRT Loder — A play on “Kurt Loder” former host on MTV News and editor at Rolling Stone
James St. Fatdick, I'll Ghost on you shorty — Originated right around the premiere of season 4 of Starz hit show "Power", here referencing the main character James St. Patrick, whose street alias is "Ghost"
Tiger Backwoods — A reference to pro golfer Tiger Woods and Mero’s love for smoking backwoods
“I no fucking baby, I fucking man!” — A reference to the viral video that sent friend of the brand Pioladitingancia to fame
“Check the guest list again because my name is definitely on it, and no I’m not stepping to the side while you check! ” — Not so much a nickname but something Mero might have said back in the day when he was broke and had to lie about being on guest lists to get into clubs
CC Dab-bathia — A play on Yankees Starting Pitchers name, CC Sabathia (and close friend of the brand)
Goldman Shm-achs — A variation of the phrase made popular by Bobby Shmurda and a reference to Goldman Sachs.
Mensch Montana — An alias borrowed from French Montana (who is from South Bronx) and popular artist with the Bodega Boys. They have mentioned his classic Mac and Cheese mixtapes numerous times on the podcast. Also this is a nod to his Jewish family connection; Mensch is Yiddish for "good guy." (credit to u/chefboyardu)
The Da-da-da Dad of the year — A play on a lyric from ScHoolboy Qs song "Man of The Year" (credit u/ZeddyG2). Mero already has three Mero Jr’s and the bodega princess, and as far as we can tell is an awesome dad, thus earning such a title. Confirmed to be a ScHoolboy Q reference in episode 56
Been-Smacked Biyombo — A play on “Bismack Biyombo”, a professional basketball player on the Charlotte Hornets
Di-Yayo Maradona — Reference to Argentinean soccer legend Diego Maradona and slang for coke (credit to u/terminal-chillness)
Dick-in-ya-bae Mutombo — A play on Dikembe Mutombo, former NBA player. Mero now respects the woman’s agency and asks for permission first before entering
Barlos Santana — A play on famed guitarist Carlos Santana and Xanax bars
The Dominican Don Dada — Jamaican Patois slang (I believe) for “top pimp” or “big player”, and as we know Mero is of Dominican descent, hence “Dominican Don Dada”. The phrase "Jamaican Don Dada" is used by the character Lennox in the movie "Belly", which is a classic in hip hop culture (credit to u/a-1-since-day-1) He follows this up with "catch me at Locksmith throwing up on myself". Locksmith is a bar on 192nd & Broadway in Inwood, which is a REALLY Dominican NYC neighborhood (credit to u/terminal-chillness)
Some variation of "swipe my card again, put the bag over it, there's definitely money on it!" — A reference to a familiar experience for anyone who has been broke, in which you lie and act like it's the store's fault when your card gets declined
Romeo Xantos — A reference to famed Bachata artist and Xanax, Bachata being a dance and music style originating in the Dominican Republic. Also the added "Sooo xanny, lemme black out" is a play on Romeo's adlib "sooo nasty, lemme find out" (credit to u/terminal-chillness)
Light-an-L Dutchie "Hello? Is it weed you're looking for?" — Another weed double entendre referencing Lionel Richie and his famous song "Hello"
Papa Sushi, The Dyckman Don — A reference to often-referenced MamaSushi, a fusion sushi restaurant on Dyckman Street in Manhattan
Tom Brazy, your girl got my balls deflated — A boastful play on the Deflategate controversy surrounding Tom Brady and the New England Patriots after the 2014-2015 AFL Championship game
Feel-da-ass Tyson (CONSENSUALLY WITH YOUR PERMISSION) — A play on “Neil DeGrasse Tyson”, a well known physicist
Lil’ Snoozie Vert— A play on the name Lil Uzi Vert. This is also in reference for when Mero actually ‘tapped out’ on Instagram Live
Fry-an-L Messi — A play on Lionel Messi, a famous Argentinian soccer player of Italian descent, and smoking an "L", slang for blunt
Joe Hookah "I dare you! To smoke with me! At MamaSushi!" — A reference to rapper Black Rob's song "I Dare You" that features Joe Hooker on the hook. MamaSushi is a high-end restaurant chain located in New York
Ben Barson my hands are gifted — During the 2016 election cycle, famed neurosurgeon Ben Carson engaged in a brief campaign for the Republican nomination. Mero took to doing impressions of him, exaggerating Carson’s urban upbringing by saying he was “Ben Barson”, in which the “C” was replaced with a “B”, as a Blood gang member would. Unlike Desus, who almost never fumbles his nicknames, Mero has maybe said this one correctly one time
Xaniel Bedingfield — A play on Daniel Bedingfield followed by Mero playing "I Gotta Get Through This" a popular song by the artist Daniel Bedingfield with lyrics that are about Xanax (credit to u/KTTeal)
Some variation of “I’ll open your medicine cabinet and take all of your Benzos” — This is self-referential in two ways: 1. The earlier reference here is to when Mero admitted to Desus that he will unashamedly go through people’s medicine cabinets in order to snoop on their lives and 2. After the boat party story in which Mero got drunk and took some Xanax’s, he added “I’ll take all of your benzos” bit to express how much he enjoys the feeling Benzodiazepines create
The Xandman — This is a play on the musical artist “Scatman John” who was most known for his song “Scatman’s World”, the chorus of which Mero imitates with this name and the accompanying vocalization
Rico Sabroso — Spanish for “Rich Tasty”, but I’m not sure what the reference here is beyond that
Baby Newport — I assume a reference to Newport brand cigarettes, stereotypically popular in urban areas
Niño Brown — A reference to the main character of the film “New Jack City”, in which Wesley Snipes plays a crack dealer named Nino Brown, but pronounced like the Spanish word for "kid", giving it some Latino flavor (credit to u/Okieant33)
The East Tremont Stevie B — East Tremont is a predominately Hispanic area of the Bronx, while Stevie B was a recording artist from the 80’s with some incredible Jheri Curls. Sometimes sings "I want to be the one your Titi is fucking" after
I met Mike Francesca im never gon’ fail — A direct reference from when the Bodega Boys actually met Mike on the last episode on Desus & Mero on Viceland. In translation, this means after finally meeting with the iconic Sports Pope this makes him unstoppable. This is also a reference to Kanye West's song 'Ultralight Beam' where Chance the Rapper says "I met Kanye West, I'm never gonna fail" (credit to u/RemyDWD)
The Plantain Supernova in the Sky — A reference to the Oasis hit “Champagne Supernova”, but changed to reflect Mero’s Dominican heritage, which often uses plantains in its cuisine. Occasionally he will sing an extended version, which goes “One day you will find me, smoking weed on Tremont/in the Plantain Supernova in the sky”. How does he hit these melodies so perfectly every time?
Tom Petty and the Ball Breakers — A play on the rock band name ‘Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers’. Mero sings the chorus from Tom Petty’s solo project “Free Fallin’” as “Free Ballin’” suggesting that he feels free doing his Zoom calls without pants
Barmelo Xanthony — An incredible play on the Bodega Boy’s favorite NBA player, Carmelo Xanthony, and Mero’s beloved Xanax’s. (credit to u/terminal-chillness) Most recently, Mero has changed his references to him making sound financial decisions and balancing his portfolio since the interview with Carmelo himself on Desus & Mero on Showtime
Some variation of “If you see me in Target approach me like a bear” — Originates from Mero’s love of getting really high and hanging out in Target. Being high sometimes makes him paranoid, so he doesn’t like people just running up on him. Desus suggested people “approach him diagonally, like you would a bear”. Mero interchanges “bear”, “Ursine Mammal”, and “Oso” (Spanish for “bear”) at random
Benzo the Clown — A problematic clown for kids that ruins birthday parties and not refunding your $50 deposit. Originated on Episode 96, Desus starts talking about rolling up to Mero Jr’s bar mitzvah smacked. (credit to u/outtaspite) Benzo’s antics are normally cut short by Mr. Fun Fun (voiced by Desus) normally ending with the problematic light
I sold fake Lean to your favorite SoundCloud rapper — Not sure this is a specific reference other than the fact that Lean is pretty much a guaranteed accessory for any SoundCloud rapper and Actavis discontinued their codeine/promethazine cough syrup in 2014 due to abuse, so a lot of people are drinking fake Lean.
"Llego el hijo de Tito y Fifa papi"/"The son of Tito and Fifa has arrived, papi — In later episodes, Mero began to include some Spanish phrases at the end of his list of aliases, usually beginning with this phrase and building off of it. When Mero does this he also says "Hassan tira me lo pita" which is slang for "Hassan drop me a beat". Mero is making pretend that he's a DJ on NY's Spanish Radio Station 97.9 La Mega. Mero from here goes on to talk all kinds of shit about how hard and gangster he is. (credit to u/bobbuddha and u/Okieant33)
Please correct me if you have ideas or see mistakes!
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Discontinued aliases:
Desus

• Young Green Room
• Desus Vice
• Vice-K Matsuzaka
• Kristap Por-sling-dick
• The Human Jerry Curl

Mero

• Blem de la blem
• Young Pap Smear
• Metro Bloomin' Onion (credit to u/raybegleiter)
• Fry-an-L Messi (Mero at one point said this instead of "Light-an-L Messi", he'll probably go back and forth)
• Papi Shampoo
• Lucious Lyon-ass nigga
• David Trizz-Dale